Me: (shutting off alarm) Well I wasn't expecting THAT last night.
Nick: That we would sleep peacefully through the entire night, completely undisturbed?
Nick: (stretching) I feel so rested.
Me: Ummm, no, I was talking about that one time when Ellie was up all night, bouncing around in her crib and whooping at the top of her lungs for hours because all you fed her for dinner was chocolate chip cookies. I've been up with her since 2:30. Didn't you hear any of that?
Nick: Like a rock.
Me: I want a raise.